Keeping Your Word To Yourself


Does anyone else struggle to keep their word, not only to others but themselves?

As I continue my journey of self discovery, sometimes what I uncover can be hard to face. But I know true and lasting change can’t begin until I start being honest about some of my most destructive habits.

I can trace so much of my anxiety, depression and stress directly to not doing what I commit to, not following through, or in some cases not planning ahead. (Because planning ahead requires keeping commitments)

Why do we continue to do things that cause us so much pain, embarrassment and shame?

For me, I think low self-esteem and perfectionist tendencies led me to constantly second guess everything I did. This eventually led to serious burnout, and now I struggle to believe I can do things without literally driving myself crazy.

I’m working to rewire my thinking about my capabilities by setting small tasks to accomplish each day. For now, my only goal is to make sure I complete those tasks.

We tend to load up our calendars and to do lists so we can accomplish more. That might be great down the line, but if you struggle to keep your commitments now, a large list can be daunting, no matter how small the tasks. Starting with one or two items can give you some much needed ‘wins’ and the motivation to keep the ‘completion’ streak going. 

Again, the goal right now is not how much you can get done, but to train your brain to trust that it will do the things you set out to do.

This is one area I’m excited to work on. It has cost me dearly in life. While it’s humbling and sometimes painful and uncomfortable to change, I know the pain of staying the same is far worse.

If you’re striving to make changes in your life, too, I applaud you. This is some of the most important work we can do.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend.

Peace,

Kari 

For some, the gap between knowing what they need to do to accomplish their goals and actually doing it is everything. As a virtual accountability partner, I help people struggling with procrastination and overwhelm take the critical steps they need to break the cycle of inaction and move forward with their lives.

31 Comments

  1. lostinmyhead07
    September 2, 2019

    This post really speaks to me. I always expect too much of myself and when I don’t accomplish my to do list it makes me feel horrible. I get depressed and feel like a crappy person. I plan to change that about myself. I am only one person and sometimes we really do try to do too much. I have so much extra time to just sit and think about the small changes I can make to improve my mental health and this is definitely one of them. It’s nice to hear that other people have the same struggles and to read about how they plan to make a change.

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      September 2, 2019

      I can totally relate. I am so good at beating myself up about things I do or don’t do. I love how you talked about making small changes to improve your mental health. I think so often we think we have to make huge, sweeping changes right away because we’re in such a hurry to stop the pain. In reality, I can see where small changes practiced consistently can add up more quickly than huge changes practiced inconsistently, or not at all. I really admire your determination to treat yourself with more kindness and compassion. It warms my heart. I read a quote recently from Louise Hay that really spoke to me. “You have the power to heal yourself, and you need to know that. We think so often that we’re helpless but we’re not. We always have the power of our minds. Claim and consciously use your power.” I know in my heart this is true. I’m working on getting my brain to believe it, too. 😉 We’re getting there. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts.

      Reply
      1. lostinmyhead07
        September 2, 2019

        Our brains are very strong… Baby steps

        Reply
  2. Chocoviv
    September 5, 2019

    True!!

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      September 6, 2019

      Thank you so much for reading! ❤️

      Reply
      1. Chocoviv
        September 6, 2019

        I think I messaged the right person on Pinterest?

        Reply
        1. Kari Watterson
          September 6, 2019

          Hi Viv. I’m not sure. I tell you what, here’s my link if you’d like. I pinned your post to my “Wanderlust” board. I’m determined to get to some of these amazing places in the world. Thanks for following me! 🙂 https://www.pinterest.com/kariannewatterson/boards/

          Reply
          1. Chocoviv
            September 6, 2019

            Invited you too:)

  3. Ryan N. Parks
    September 7, 2019

    Wow! This is a great blog post message! I soooo can relate. I appreciate your transparency and for sharing your experiences. I look forward to reading other posts & learning from you! I wrote a blog post titled Stop Beating Yourself Up, that I think you’ll really enjoy…
    https://empoweryourself176.wordpress.com/2018/11/24/2248/

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      September 7, 2019

      Thank you so much for your kind words. I think procrastination is a universal issue, but the good news is there are things we can do to help ourselves. I just hopped on your blog and read your post. What a grace-filled message. Thank you so much. I would encourage anyone reading this to hop on over to read Ryan’s blog as well. I look forward to reading more of your blog, too, Ryan. Thank you again!

      Reply
      1. Ryan
        September 10, 2019

        Awesome! God bless you and your readers!

        Reply
  4. YBP
    September 9, 2019

    Fantastic read Kari! Looking forward to more lovely inspiration! ❤️💕❤️💕❤️💕

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      September 9, 2019

      Thank you so much for reading and for your kind words! Have a wonderful day!

      Reply
  5. Joel Abakah
    September 14, 2019

    I agree with you. I think commitment is one of those key values that can unlock success in the very things we set ourselves to do. If we become uncommitted to ourselves it may become a real struggle to cope with it demands at workplaces or with the people close to you. Rewiring thoughts like you said is very major if we’re to take that step of commitment.
    Lovely post 💚💚

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      September 17, 2019

      Hi Joel, I’m so sorry for the delay! Thank you so much for your thoughtful comment. I agree 100% with you. Not honoring commitments have caused such destruction in my life and on my psyche. So many of us spend years looking for “magic” answers that we can’t see the solutions we seek have been within us the entire time. Reframing thoughts to create new neural pathways is a thought-by-thought, day by day process, at least for me. It’s so easy to slip back to our self-destructive, limiting thoughts, but if we continue to practice our new thoughts, I know the rewards will be worth it. Thank you so much for reading and sharing your insight.

      Reply
      1. Joel Abakah
        September 17, 2019

        Don’t worry about the late reply… we are all busy sometimes
        I appreciate the advice. Thanks a lot 💚💚

        Reply
  6. Mathew
    September 17, 2019

    Very inspiring words Kari and certainly there is truth to all of that!
    Wonderful blog post. I hope you keep it up 🙂

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      September 17, 2019

      Thank you, Mathew! Long ago, a person’s word meant everything. I’m working to re-instill that sense of pride and honor in myself. I’m convinced self-trust is one of the keys to self-confidence. Thanks so much for reading.

      Reply
  7. bigskybuckeye
    September 25, 2019

    Kari, I heard a great bit of advice at a high school commencement years ago . . . promise less, deliver more.

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      September 25, 2019

      I absolutely love that advice. I know we have a tendency to over-promise and then feel compelled to deliver a masterpiece. Unfortunately, this can trigger perfectionism and lead to procrastination, self-doubt, self-sabotage — all the unhealthy, self-destructive things. If you promise less but over-deliver (and on time), it’s a win-win. You build confidence, gain trust and, maybe most importantly, move forward rather than staying stuck. Such great advice. Thanks so much for sharing!

      Reply
      1. bigskybuckeye
        September 25, 2019

        The advice came from a man who shared weather forecasts on the radio. His wisdom has helped me at times, and I need to remind myself more often.

        Reply
  8. ปั้มไลค์
    October 15, 2019

    Like!! I blog frequently and I really thank you for your content. The article has truly peaked my interest.

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      October 24, 2019

      Thank you so much! I really appreciate it!

      Reply
  9. Suzette Benjamin
    October 23, 2019

    Great post. Very heartfelt words. You are a survivor. Keep on❤❤

    Reply
    1. Kari Watterson
      October 24, 2019

      Hi Suzette, thank you so much. Sometimes it’s hard to look in the mirror with honesty, but when you can do it from a place of love and compassion you allow room for growth. Thanks for your kind words and encouragement. 🙂

      Reply
      1. Suzette Benjamin
        October 24, 2019

        ❤❤

        Reply
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