We all struggle with self-doubt. Negative, self-defeating thoughts are part of the human experience.
But what happens next is what matters most.
When thoughts like “I’m not good enough” or “Why bother?” take over, they ripple through every part of our lives.
- We feel anxious, stuck, or hopeless.
- We avoid opportunities and stop showing up for ourselves.
- We convince ourselves that change is impossible.
And yet, a part of us still longs for something more.
But instead of taking steps forward, we:
- Overthink every possibility until we’re paralyzed by indecision.
- Drown out the discomfort with distractions:
- Scrolling.
- Zoning out.
- Overworking, overeating, or overspending.
In the end, we avoid the risk of failure by deciding in advance to stay exactly where we are.
We don’t mean to let ourselves down, but that’s exactly what happens.
The Power of Mindset Work
This was me for years.
I spent decades of my life unaware that I had the power to stop my own mind drama.
I felt at the mercy of my own thoughts.
Some days, my thoughts were nicer to me, and I felt happier, relieved, more confident.
But most days, my inner critic was in full force.
The constant inner battle was exhausting.
But then I heard about mindset work and learned how much biology and evolution play a role in shaping how we live our lives.
I discovered that what we think—consciously or subconsciously—creates physiological responses in our bodies (“feelings”).
And those feelings drive us to do, or not do, everything in life.
Bottom line: if I wanted to change my life, I needed to first understand the biology behind my thoughts. Then, I could start questioning everything I believed about my mind.
Learning to See Thoughts Differently
Most of us don’t realize we have the ability to choose or discard our thoughts.
We treat them as facts—unchangeable and absolute.
But here’s the truth: thoughts are just sentences in our minds.
As Brooke Castillo says, “Thoughts are just sentences in your head.”
Think back to grade school when you learned to use new vocabulary words in sentences. At their core, sentences are just strings of words pulled from a dictionary.
What happens when we view thoughts this way—neutral and detached?
The emotional weight they carry starts to lift.
For the first time, I understood what people meant when they said, “You are not your thoughts.”
This distinction changes everything. If thoughts are just something we have rather than something that defines us, we have a choice:
- Keep them.
- Reframe them.
- Let them go.
When we can separate our thoughts from our identity, our mind stops feeling like a prison. Instead of being stuck in an echo chamber of negativity, self-doubt, and helplessness, we create space for vibrancy, creativity, and joy.
Without this separation, our thoughts can take over, turning our minds into a source of toxicity rather than inspiration.
And when our minds feel unsafe, it’s no wonder we seek escape through numbing behaviors like scrolling, zoning out, or overconsuming.
But here’s the good news:
You can change your relationship with your mind.
And when you do, your life will change, too.
Taking Back Control
For years, I didn’t know I had the power to help myself out of my suffering.
I gave decades of my life to depression, anxiety, and hopelessness.
But once I learned tools to deconstruct my thinking, everything changed.
The process of unlearning, relearning, forgetting, and remembering hasn’t been easy. Some parts have been painful and frustrating.
But here’s the difference:
Now, I know my thoughts are optional.
That knowledge has been life-changing.
Today, my relationship with my mind looks completely different:
- I don’t view my thoughts as problems. Instead, I see them as opportunities for curiosity and growth.
- I understand that my thoughts create my reality. But I also know I have the power to choose what I think—and, in turn, shape my reality.
- I’m aware that my thoughts influence my emotions. And because of this, I can actively create emotional experiences that serve me, rather than being at their mercy.
Mindset work is about seeing thoughts for what they are—habitual, conditioned, and often untrue.
And it’s about using that awareness to create new patterns, new possibilities, and a new way forward.
The Choice is Yours
What if you stopped seeing your thoughts as facts and started seeing them as choices?
This shift is the foundation of mindset work:
- Recognizing the thoughts that no longer serve you.
- Choosing thoughts that align with what you want to create.
When you work with your brain instead of against it, you transform how you think, feel, and show up in the world.
The power is in your hands.
The Impact of Mindset Work
If you do this work, you won’t be spared from experiencing negative, uncomfortable, or sometimes painful emotions.
But this time, you’ll have tools and concepts to help you face, process, and acknowledge them.
You’ll learn to loosen their grip over your mind and body.
Instead of being hijacked by them, you become stronger each time you work through them.
The more we lean into our fears instead of running from them, the faster we grow our belief in our ability to do hard things and to bounce back when setbacks inevitably occur.
Ultimately, we learn that emotions are survivable.
When we know this and do the daily work to truly see and feel it, our lives become exponentially bigger.
This Is the Work I Do
This is the type of work I help my clients with as a mindset coach.
Mindset work is like developing any important skill—it takes time, intentional effort, and consistent, daily practice.
But even the smallest mindset shifts can lead to real and lasting change.
At the end of the day, this is my passion—helping people see that change is possible for them, too.
A Path Forward
It all starts with understanding why we do what we do and using that knowledge to create more of what we want in life, and less of what we don’t.
When my clients learn these tools, life starts to look different.
Change seems possible.
Because it absolutely is.
Ready to Change?
If this resonates with you, I’d love to help you change your life, too.
The first step is an initial coaching call with me.
We’ll explore what’s holding you back and how adopting a growth mindset can set the stage for a whole new way of thinking and being in the world.
If this sounds like the work you’ve been longing to do, click the button below to schedule a free 90-minute coaching call.
For more details on my coaching philosophy and what it means to do this life-changing work:
Listen to my podcast, The End of the Day: A Mindset Podcast
Click the “Work With Me” tab
Follow me on Instagram (@kari_mindsetcoach) for mindset tips, tools, and resources